For Christ's Sake, Somebody Change The Mother Effing Tape

Some baseball-related deity up there really, really hates me.

Situation: Cards 5, Astros 2. Adam Wainwright has just blown through a perfect and spotless 7th inning in which he has struck out 2 of the 3 batters he faced. So he goes back for the eighth. Gets into trouble straightaway. Gives up two runs - although the ump did screw him like a drill on one call to Biggio, which should have ended the AB before he had the chance to get that RBI single. They pull Adam for Tyler Johnson, who executes a Houdini-like bit of wriggling to get out of it. God, the nightmares I have about the bottom of the eighth inning at the fucking Juice Box in Houston.

Then Braden Looper is put in to hold a slim 5-4 advantage in the bottom of the ninth. Fat Elvis Berkman isn't involved this time, but the outcome is the same. Looper, abruptly realizing that he's supposed to suck, lives up to his billing and blows it. 6-5 'Stros is your final.

I don't have anything else to say. St. Louis Cardinals: Your 2006 NL Central Winners. By default.